The Beauty of Death

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​The beauty of death….
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Why am I even talking about this? What, if anything, can be beautiful when an animal dies? You must know that all three of my old cats passed away within a time span of only five months last year. As you can imagine, that was a lot to process.

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​Did I grieve? Yes, absolutely! Do I miss them? Yes! What makes anything about this experience beautiful and meaningful?

​Let me try to explain: The one thing that I have learned in my relationship with animals is that I am completely and totally committed to maintaining connection! 
For me the relationship with my pets does not end with the death of the physical body.
This being said I do not want to convince you to believe this.
It’s not about avoiding grief, sorrow or devastation. It’s about creating a sacred space for the end of life. When we receive a terminal diagnosis for our pet, many of us - at least initially - experience a state of shock, trepidation, depression and an anticipation of pain.
All of these emotions need to be acknowledged. Fully. And the process of dying can be a roller coaster for both you and your pet.
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So what can you do before things get tough?
Consider having logistics in place before the active phase of dying. You might want to have phone numbers and references ready way ahead of time such as pricing of euthanasia, cremation, after hour services, in-home veterinary services and so on. You might also consider having extra pain relief, comfortable beds, heating pads and the likes on hand and a quiet space for your pet if you have a busy household.
These are just a few examples of the many variables that may occur.

So what is the beauty of death?
For me it means that I love my pet with all my heart and even more so at the time of their sunset and that I remain present with them. Most of my own pets came to me as seniors, often from a shelter environment. Usually I don’t know how they grew up, where they were born and what happened during the early years of their life. During hospice I do a life review with them and create a bucket list if there is enough time.

LIFE REVIEW:
In the life review, I share with my pets my imagination of

• What they were like when they were born, still completely innocent and pure.
• How the mama dog or the mama cat loved up on them.
• How they might have been separated too soon from their mother, from their litter.
• How they might have felt lost or abandoned and eventually ended up on the street or at a shelter.
• And how extremely lucky and honored I feel, that they found their way to me and that I had the privilege to share my life with them.
• I look at how they have made me a better person, how they have been by my side through life’s challenges and what they have taught me.

To prepare gently, deliberately and peacefully for the end of our pet’s earthly journey- as gut wrenching as it is at times - can be one of the greatest gifts.

- Ute

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